Posts Tagged ‘cognitive skills’

Talking to Your Children About Your Diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis

When I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, my children were 14, 11, and 8. Along with the difficulties of dealing with being diagnosed with a disease like MS, came the difficulties of deciding how to tell the kids. I am not sure which is harder getting the diagnosis or answering the questions your kids will ask. For some people, Multiple Sclerosis is diagnosed very quickly due to a rapid onset. For most people getting the diagnosis comes after months or even years of symptoms and testing. Kids are smarter then we give them credit for. They know when Mom or Dad are sick, hurting, upset, and even scared. I think there is controversy about what you should share with your kids. Some might feel that there kids would not understand, or that they might get too upset, or even treat their Mom or Dad differently if they knew the truth.

I was initially diagnosed in August of 2006 but actually confirmed diagnosis in March of 2007. There was a long period of time before getting the final diagnosis. I was bedridden and my cognitive skills were rapidly declining. I too felt that my kids were too young to understand. One day my middle child ( my son) came into my room and laid next to me and as he laid there he kept looking at me. I knew he had something he wanted to ask or tell me but did not know how to say it. Then the words came out. “Mom are you going to die”? I started to tear up. Here I thought I was protecting them and instead my children were fearing the worst. I decided right then and there that it was time for me to do some talking and explaining to them about what was going on with me along with what Multiple Sclerosis is and what it does. The biggest problem I found is that I did not know how to explain something that I did not even understand. Along with that I knew I was dealing with three children at three different ages. I took the time to talk to each one individually at each age level. Read more…